The Luchy-Ritesh War of 2007

These are excerpts from the recent Luchy vs. Ritesh email war of 2007. I think you will all enjoy the content here.

From Luchy

ritesh, you fucking suck. i hate you so much i cry. the only thing more miserable than my job is the thought of you. thanks for showing me your car, asshole. i hope you get a belly ache after the munchies...@#$%$%^^&&**!@@#$$%^^&&**((!!@@##

Ritesh responds with

Wow, you must have really been fucked up when you wrote this. Listen, there was no time to show you the car. You always had something going on. How about I send you a picture instead, or maybe I'll doodle a caricature and mail it to you. Let me know which you would like.

Luchy's counterpoint

ritesh, i'll tell you where to stick that fucking caricature. you picked the wrong week to mess with me, you prick! you better watch out, next time i see you, i'll fucking run you over with your own car. you are such a flaming fagel that it's a wonder why you don't sponateously combust!! by the way, i'm totally 100% sober...

Ritesh again responds with

Simmer down little lady. I think you need to try the decaf from now on, and lay off the amphetamines too! If you're still angry I suggest you take it out on Salman. I'm sure he'll be agreeable. I think giving him a swift kick in the nuts will help you feel a whole heck of a lot better.

And finally Luchy concludes the exchange with

haha! tesh, i can't drink decaf- you know that i make that cuban cafe that packs a real punch...if i had any uppers, i would have taken them all by now. don't you worry about salman...he's had his share of aggression this week. trust me, just ask him. however, your idea has some merit. kicking him in the balls would really take the edge off. next time i see him, i think i'll try it...

Once again I am left saying "What the fuck?" Screw both of you. I hope this war takes both of you to a mutually gruesome conclusion.